Realizations

I am not sure if I have mentioned this, but when I moved out from the apartment that my ex and I shared I couldn't afford to move anywhere else so I moved into the vacant unit right next door.  Not what I should have done but what am I going to do now, I still can't afford to move anywhere else.  Anyway, the other night I had a mutual friend of me and my ex come to my door at 1:30am drunk, like vomit all over his shirt drunk.  He only came to my door because he knew that my exes new girlfriend was over and he didn't want to impose on them.  So I told him to go take a shower (becasue he had puked all over himself) and then when he went into the bathroom I went and knocked on my exes door and told him what was going on and he came over (much to his girlfriends distaste) and helped me deal with it.  And we ended up calling 911 because he was just getting worse, he had lost all control of bodily functions all over my bathroom and I honestly thought he was going to die right there on my bathroom floor!!

Anyway, that was a few weeks ago and he got out of the hospital and was going to stay with my ex for a bit while he was doing some sort of rehab but 3 days of living with my ex and his new girlfriend and he was about ready to beat the shit out of her!  She was trying to boss him around and treating him like shit and my ex never stood up for him and he let her treat him like that!!  And she doesn't even live there, I mean, she has moved herself right in, but her name is not on the lease!!  And she was trying to get him to talk shit about me when my ex wasn't home and they were both telling him how crazy I was and that they were going to get a restraining order against me just to force me to move.  :-(  I have done nothing to this bitch, I haven't even met her, have not said one word to her!  she tried to run me down while I was taking the trash out because I glared at her!  wtf!?

Anyway, my friend and my ex got into a huge fight tonight and he came over and we talked for a couple hours.  We bitched about my exes new girlfriend and he was telling all about how she treats him like shit, like worse than I ever treated him.  And how she is the crazy one and is mean hearted.  I honestly don't know why he would have left me for her.

But my friend is right, I need to really let my ex go and just not have any contact with him at all (its not like we actually see each other even though we live right next to each other).  He was saying how he thinks my ex is getting some sort of satisfaction knowing that if things went bad with his new girlfriend right now, or any time in the near future, that he could come crawling back to me and I would take him back and he wouldn't have to be alone.  And its true and it needs to not be true...I need to sever all ties to him, as hard as that will be for me, I am not a safety net for him.  He jumped from one serious relationship to another one before the old one was even done with, and me, I am on my own, my situation has drastically changed and I need to embrace it, I need to truly move on, I have come to realize that as long as this other woman is in the picture, my ex and I can't be friends.  And it hurts me so much that he is choosing this horrible person that treats him far worse than I ever treated him, over a friendship with me.

I lost... :-(

It has been exactly a month since I last wrote.  I moved about 2 weeks ago, just into the unit next door from my old place but it is a place of my own and I'm not living with my ex, so that is something.  He is officially in a new relationship with one of his coworkers, Erin, and she has practically moved herself right in with him (he is still in our old unit).  He keeps saying that he won't let her move in with him, but he has...she even has her little dog over there too.

Us being friends has kind of fizzled.  She has told him point blank that he isn't to have any kind of contact with me for fear that I will seduce him away from her.  If she is that worried about him cheating on her and/or leaving her to come back to me, than she has issues.  He has made it very clear where I stand and the fact that he doesn't have romantic feelings for me anymore (and hasn't for over a year).  But he is afraid that if he goes behind her back to hang out with me and txt with me that she will find out and that she will blow up and be mad at him and cause him all sorts of stress and drama.  And when we had been hanging out I would get frustrated at him because he was so stressed about her randomly showing up or finding out that he was with me and that caused him stress and drama with me and he just couldn't take it from both sides anymore.  So of course he chose her.  :-(

We had a fight the other day and he hasn't spoken to me since.  I had tried to convince him to have the 3 of us sit down and talk and to get her to understand that she has nothing to fear from us remaining friends.  Yes, we have a history together, but it is in the past and he has made that very clear...to me at least.  Why she can't wrap her head around that concept is beyond me.  I just txted him about an hour ago asking him to come over and talk to me so I can figure out where we stand but he hasn't responded or come over yet...so I have a feeling that he has made his final decision and decided that us being friends isn't going to work out...all because he is unwilling to fight for it and to defend the idea to his new girlfriend

He has been telling me for the last month or so that he didn't want to cut me out of his life completely and that he was willing to fight for us to remain friends and that he wasn't going to let her control who his friends are...but when it really mattered and it came time for him to truly fight for our friendship...he threw in the towel...he gave in to her demands and ultimatums of her or me...he chose her...even though we hadn't really been working and thriving as a romantic couple, we still had good times together and I thought that he really did care about keeping me in his life even if it was just as a friend.

I obviously still have feelings for him and those won't go away over night, but I was willing to hide them and to just enjoy hanging out and eventually I would have found someone else and we could be truly happy for each other that we had found other people to love and to be with but he has made the choice that keeping his ex-girlfriend (a person that he doesn't see any kind of romantic future with) around wasn't worth loosing his new girlfriend who he might have a future with...

Sad and Lonely

Spent the day at home today just hanging out enjoying the rain outside.  It was really nice compared to all the heat we have had the last few weeks. One of the reasons I have stayed in the pacific northwest all these years is the weather, among other things.  I hate when we have crazy heat waves though!

I have actually been thinking though, for awhile now actually...I am tired of the family drama and I'm tired of the fact that all of my so called friends have left and want nothing to do with me.  And alot of that I'm sure is my own fault, but still.  And now that Joseph and I aren't together anymore and he is having a blast sleeping around with all these women and doesn't really seem to miss me all that much...I really have nothing truly holding me here anymore.  I have been honestly thinking about just packing me and Bessie up and leaving and not looking back.  I have experience at several large companies and so I could probably get a job easily wherever I choose to go...I just want a fresh start somewhere where no one knows me.

It really bothers me that he is just sleeping with all these people like its nothing..in the last month he has been slept with 2 girls (many times each) and now starting tomorrow he is adding another one to his growing list of whores...does he even care that him flaunting his sex life in front of me a month after we broke up is hurting me so bad!?  I don't think that he does...when we were together I dragged him down sexually and he is making up for lost time I guess.  He was the only person I have ever been with and so if he wanted something different or special than he needed to let me know...you know!?  I'm not a mind reader...I don't know that you are bored in bed unless you tell me.  And what really pisses me off is that I have been telling him for years that we needed to spice things up...I wanted to try new things and he never wanted to.  And it was always about him and his wants and needs in bed...he never seemed to care that I wasn't satisfied with our sex life either.  What I need to do is go out and start sleeping with a bunch of guys and gaining experience and figuring out exactly what I want sexually...but in order to do that you need to be able to go out and have a life and I really don't want to bring anyone home...my bed is the bed Joseph and I have shared the last 5 years and I just feel weird about sharing it with anyone else...and I know that is stupid and sentimental but I just can't get over that.

I just don't know about anything anymore...I have no idea what I want out of life...I have no idea where I am going or where I will end up and it is scary and I don't like it...

My ex is a man whore...totally out of left field...

So I was bored the other night and joined match.com....I really wish you didnt have to pay money to actually contact people on there...some of the guys were really cute and sound like the could be fun!  :-(  Stupid sites...I may as well just go out to a bar if I am going to spend money to meet guys.

My ex-boyfriend/part time roommate that is shacking up with his new girlfriend/coworker is such a man whore...after 8 1/2 years with him, I had no idea that he was like this.  Not only did he cheat on me with one of the girls he works with, he is now "dating" and shacking up with a different girl he works with and just told me tonight that he is going out with yet another one of his coworkers on Thursday!!  wtf!!!  We have only been broken up for just over a month!!!  And we have hooked up a few times in the last few weeks too (I know, I shouldn't have but you know what, I am lonely and not the type of person to just go throw myself at random guys at a bar) ...and his new "girlfriend" has no idea that he is essentially cheating on her with me and now some other girl that they work with...and he has no plans to tell her any of this...I just honestly don't know him at all anymore...if I ever truly did.

I believe him when he has told me that he only cheated on me twice in the time we were together (last summer and right before we broke up a month or so ago)...I told him that if we had any chance at being friends that I need 100% honesty from him...and he has been true to that...even when I haven't wanted him to be.

You have to know our history a bit to fully understand our relationship...we met when he was 21 and I was 18 (we are now 30 and 27).  We worked together for about 4-5 months before we started "dating" outside of work (just movies and he lived close to me so he would take me to and from work sometimes when we had similar shifts).  And then on my 19th birthday in January 2006 our relationship changed, I had checked myself into a hotel for the weekend as a treat to myself to "get away" from everyone...and Joseph stayed the weekend with me...We didn't have sex until 3 months later on his 22nd birthday, but we made the jump on my birthday weekend to more than just coworkers hanging out outside of work.  We were never truly "friends" before though and when we jumped into a relationship we never had that friendship foundation.

So now, 9 years later, we have hit rock bottom and we both decided that we need to take a break from being together while we work on just being friends, as well as work on our own personal issues that both of us have.  I won't say that it has been easy, because it has been hell some nights...knowing he is with someone else, but I still love him and I want him to be happy.  And if his man-whore ways are making him happy right now, then so be it.  I won't lie, I do hope that he will realize down the road that I am the one he wants to really be with...and maybe he will and maybe he won't...and maybe I will find someone else in the meantime that I love and want to be with more than him.  All I know for sure is that I don't want to loose him from my life and I do want us to be friends.

I don't know...I am rambling a bit...one of the things that Joseph and I had problems with in the past is that I would vent and talk his ear off about everything and I would expect him to fix my problems and essentially use him as a free psychologist...but then I wouldn't do the same for him...he was always on me about starting a journal or something, so this is me finally doing that.  I am aware that this may never actually be seen and read by anyone, but I also know that it may actually be seen and read by people, including family and friends...I am posting it here instead of on facebook because I am tired of the negative comments and such about my venting...so I am not looking for advice or judgment for what I write about on here...this is my venting space.

Been gone almost 2 years....

It has been just under 2 years since I updated this blog and alot of shit has gone down in the last 2 years of my life.

*June 2013 -- I graduated from college with 2 associates degrees, Associates in Arts and Science: Journalism and also an Associates in General Studies.

*July/August 2013 -- I stopped working at Macy's just after my 6 year anniversary there and started working as a residential housekeeper.  I was still working as a merchandiser at Michaels in the morning as well.  Also in August 2013 my boyfriend of 7 1/2 years cheated on me and we "took a break".  The break didn't last long, we were back together by Christmas.

*May 2014 -- Quit working at Michaels and being a residential housekeeper in order to work at a brand new hotel where I was supposed to be the Housekeeping Supervisor.  This was a lie, but I will get back to that later.

*July 4, 2014 -- Found out that my boyfriend cheated on me (again) with a new coworker and we broke up (again).  He then hooked up with yet another coworker...

That leads me to now.  Due to lack of financial stability on both of our parts, my ex-boyfriend and I are still living together (he sleeps either on the couch or in the spare room on a futon).  That is, when he stays here, the second coworker that he hooked up with a month ago, he has been staying at her place most nights.  We are trying to maintain a friendship but it is really hard.  Even with everything that he has done and put me through, I still love him.  I know, I'm stupid and ridiculous but the heart wants what the heart wants.  Neither of us want to push the other one out of our lives and we want to be friends but I honestly don't know if that will be able to happen.  In the last month since we broke up he has opened up to me and shown me a side of himself that he hid away from me for 9 years!!  And at this point, I don't love that side of him, I love the side of him that I have known for the last 9 years.  And I honestly don't know if I will ever love that side of him...but I need to not worry about that.  When we started dating, we just sort of jumped right in and never had a true friendship and we are wanting to see if we can build that friendship now.

And back to the work thing.  I was hired to do the construction clean of the brand new hotel.  The elevator didn't work so we were hauling all of our shop-vacs and supplies up and down 6 flights of stairs and it was very physically demanding.  Then they kept pushing back the opening of the hotel because the elevators couldn't pass the final inspection...so they ended up not having us work for an entire week!  And then they passed and we had 3 days to get the hotel ready to open.  We should have been doing all that prep work the week that we didn't work because right now we are suffering for it.

There are linen closets on each floor that are supposed to have the amenities and extra towels and sheets and such...they never put shelving units in them and so the boxes of amenities are just sitting on the floors of these closets and when we need more linens and such we have to go down to the laundry room and carry in our arms what we need back to the floors that we are working on...and they are giving us about 20 rooms a day to clean if we are working by ourselves and then if we are paired up with someone we are doing between 30 and 40 rooms!!!  And they are forcing us to work 9-12 hour days 5 days a week and then trying to call us in on our days off and getting mad when we tell them no!!!  This whole place is a disaster and I really can't stay there much longer!  I am going to talk to the General Manager hopefully tomorrow and see if  I can move into a different position that is a little less hectic until I can find another job.

What really pisses me off about this job is that I was promised things during my interview (things I said were deal breakers!!!) and she said yes to everything and then I got none of it!!  Well, I guess that is not entirely true..they are forcing me to work 40+ hours a week...but they are expecting me to do the work of 2 or more people!!  It is ridiculous!!!  I have applied for about 20 different jobs in the last 24 hours and I am getting very impatient!!  ugh!!!

But on a happier note, my sister and brother in law are FINALLY expecting their first child this winter!!!  They have been trying for about 5 years or so and it finally happened!!  So very exciting...this is the best thing in my life right now!

Update

I took the summer off of from school and so I let my blog that I created my a class slip into non-use.  I am going to try to start writing again.  There will probably be alot of stuff about school...but since this isn't for a class anymore I will be more myself than some of the previous posts!  lol!

I have 3 more quarters to go until I graduate.  Well, I will technically be finished with my degree at the end of winter quarter, but I have full financial aid through the end of spring quarter and so I will be taking my foreign language courses and a few others too.

Right now I am taking a creative non-fiction class on campus, a geology class online and an anicent history class online as well.  My geology class we were forced into a groups and we have to do "group work" every week...and my group sucks because they don't really do anything helpful!  My ancient history class is kind of stupid too because we have to turn in "self graded assements" every week and we basically grade ourselves...isn't that the instructors job!?  And my writing class is annoying because we are having to write about a bunch of personal stuff.  I am honestly regretting not choosing english 102 (the critical paper).  I am so much better at writing research papers and fiction stories.

I am not motivated to do any of my homework the last few days, especially since I sprained my back on Tuesday.  I have been house bound and pretty much chair bound for 2 days and my back is still crazy sore!  I am walking around okay, but getting up out of the chair is a pain in the ass.  My back will spasm sometimes and it sends pain shooting up and down my back and legs.  So not cool!  My uncle is bringing me a back massager that attaches to a chair...I am actaully really looking forward to that!  I have tried everything...heating pad...ice packs...walking around...stretching...ointments...everything!!  Ugh!!

Anyway...going to go and try to get some homework done now!

Evaluation of a multimedia story online

So this week's blog assignment was to go to this link and watch/read at least one story that has won an online journalism award for 2011.

http://journalists.org/2011/09/25/2011-­‐online-­‐ journalism-­‐award-­‐winners-­‐announced/

I chose to watch a piece that won for online video journalism for a large site.  The story was titled, Caught in the Crossfire: Victims of Gang Violence that was put together for the Los Angeles Times.


http://www.latimes.com/news/local/la-gangviolence-html,0,6290501.htmlstory

This piece was really well done!  It made me cry!  The piece chronicles the stories of 6 gunshot victims (several of which survived), that were shot during gang shootings. 

One of the victims that survived was a little 5 year-old boy named Josue Hercules that was shot in the back of the head while playing in his own backyard.  His older sister carried him inside to their mother and the paramedics never came.  The mother had to drive her young son to the hospital.

The story was an amazing example of awesome multimedia journalism.  The interviews of the victims and their families were conducted in a quiet place, with no background noises and lighting that shown down on the subjects.  And for the most part, the interviews were shot where the subjects were in the left or right portions of the rule of thirds for shooting.  There were a few times that the subjects looked into the camera, but honestly I don't think in this case it was bad.  You could literally look into these people's eyes and see the pain!  It was real and deep and you could see that when they looked up into the camera!  It pulled you into their stories and it made you start to feel their pain!

I loved how they showed mostly pictures with voice overs, as opposed to a lot of just interview shots.  They jumped around and didn't just tell one story at a time, which I think kept it interesting.

They also had the final product, but also had links to each of the interviews so you could hear the individual stories one at a time and get the entire story.

I think that this story is a great example of how multimedia journalism can be used to tell stories from all aspects.  you can get clear pictures of the who, what ,where, when, how and in some cases the why.  In this case, we don't get the why answered.  I do wish that I could have a little more info on the stories.  Did they catch the gang-bangers that took part in these shootings?  Did they hit their intended targets?  If not, do they feel remorse about hitting a young child instead?

For a journalist to take on a project like this; for putting their lives on the line to go behind enemy lines right here on U.S. soil to get these stories is amazing to me!

interview video...sorry its late!

Here is the raw video of my interview with my little sister about her pole vaulting career at EHS.  Sorry its late!  Didn't realize that I had to download it to youtube and then download on here!  lol!

Not letting me upload video...try again after work

Okay...so yesterday I did an interview with my little sister for my final project about her pole vaulting.  I am going to post it on here for the assignment, but it is not edited in any way...so you hear me asking questions and us laughing and a janitor walks into the shot and talks to us...it is also about 13 minutes long...so don't feel like you have to watch all of it!  lol!


Okay...so this is not letting me upload it for some reason...I have to go to work and I will try again later this afternoon to upload the file...if it wont let me uplaod the actual video...I will see if it will let me upload the audio file instead.   (I had the video camera and voice recorder going douring the interview!)

21 more credits! :-)

I was looking on the degree audit on the college website yesterday and realized that I only have 21 more credits til I can gradutate!  I just need 5 more classes!  That is only fall and winter quarter next year!!  But I also need to get my foreign language classes on top of that 21 credits.  So I will probably take them winter and spring quarter next year!

There is an end in sight!  I have been in school for 2 years and to be completely honest...have been contemplating just giving up lately.  I go to school full time; 3 classes (or more) every quarter and they are all really intense classes with alot of homework.  And I work 2 jobs on top of that.  I am hardly ever home and hardly ever have time to do anything fun anymore.

Plus the college paper is like a 3rd job because pretty much all of the work is done outside of class time.  And speaking of the paper...this is a really tough decision, but I have decided that I will probably take the fall quarter off from that class!  I'm sure my editors will not be happy, but I will be back for at at least one more quarter, just not fall.  I need to focus on the few other classes I need for my degree!  I have also decided that I will offer to still write an occasional story for the paper if they are interested and just be a contributing writer.

Right now I am looking for another summer job because my other 2 jobs will not have a ton of extra hours for me and I need to get my car completely fixed and in good working order.  That and I want to have savings!  I have always sucked at saving money and when I have extra money come my way it always ends up going to bills or other things like taking my kitty in for her shots or something.

Brain on summer mode

This quarter is going by so slow right now!  With all of the great weather my brain has been on summer mode already.  And between that and being sick and not feeling up to doing anything (including homework), I am behind in all 3 of my classes right now!

I have done 1 chapter of my 5 chapters in math and really need to get going on that!  I sould be done with at least 3 chapters of it already!  It's my last math class too!  Which is so exciting...you have no idea!  I hate math!

I have been out for both of my journalism classes so far this week because of being sick and no one is getting back to me!  I txted my editor to let her know on monday that  I wasn't going to be there and then turned in my 2 stories from last week late on monday.  And I have emailed and stuff too, and no response!  :-(  I have no idea what we are doing in class today!  And its production night, not looking forward to a late night, I'm hoping that we just get the class period to work on it too, which would hopefully mean that we are out of there earlier than we would normally be done!

And I am going to interview my little sister for my blog assignment for this week tomorrow after class and an interview for my new story for the paper.

I still need to work on the assignment that is due tomorrow...I think that my storyboard will probably end up being stick figures!  lol!   I suck at drawing!  I am really excited for this final project though.  It will be fun to get to hang out with my baby sister more!  :-)

Final project ideas

Our assignment for this week in my multimedia journalism class is to write out two fully developed plans for our final project.  I will admit that I haven't really thought about it that much.

I have used The Clipper production night for my slide-show assignment...and it may be my back up plan for my video project for this week as well.  I had a few other ideas for the video, but unfortunately they will probably fall through for lack of time and availability of a camera.

One idea I had was to do a how to documentary of my boyfriend working on my car.  But he is being difficult and doesn't want to do it.  He is of the mind that cameras steal a persons soul (he is ridiculous like that).  That and all of his good tools are at work (he is a mechanic at a dealership).

My other idea that I really wanted to do was to shoot my 16-year-old sister at track practice.  She is the only girl pole vaulter for Everett High School and she is pretty good at it.  The point would be that she is the only girl and why she chose pole vault and how she interacts with the guys and such.  She made it to WESCO this year!  I sadly will have to work during that...sucky!  But with time constraints I will probably not be able to get to her practice today.  (Tomorrow I have class and a test for my online class and production night with The Clipper and then it is due on Thursday).

I had another idea this morning too.  My older sister, my next younger sister and I went to New York a few years ago and I was thinking maybe interviewing one or both of them and putting in some pictures from the trip between the interviews.  It would essentially be a travel documentary thing.  But again...not sure if I will actually get the change to see my sisters before Thursday.

These could all be potentially ideas for my final project.  I would definitely have time to develop them between now and then.  Although track is almost done with and so I would need a different angle for that idea.

So far these are my ideas for my final project...but like I said before...haven't really been thinking about it that much!

apologies for being gone for so long

Okay...so I have been seriously neglecting my blog for the last few weeks.  So I will be coming back and actually doing my weekly blog posts from this week onward.  Not much more than that though...been neglecting my homework for other classes too (work has overtaken my life!)

Accuracy issues and sleep deprivation

My other story this last week that had issues was on student fees.  And first off let me say that it was a story that was kind of tossed on me at the end of last quarter and that carried on over to this quarter and this is not an easy topic to writer about if you have enver paid attention to budget issues before.


That being said, I went in yesterday and dropped off an accuracy survey (that is required for all Clipper stories) with my source from the story.  I went back in today to see if he had it done and he was actually just finishing it.  It took him 2 hours to write up!!


Last week when the story came out they actaully got the whole office together and had a meeting specifically about my story!  :-(


So first of all, there was some things that my source admitted to being vague about and not going into detail about in the interview.  And there was the fact that I didn't bring a recorder to the interview (that day was just crazy busy and hectic and I didn't have time to grab one!)  And here was the fact that I just didn't understand all of the technical babble associated with the budget stuff.  And I should have asked to have a few things clarified, but I thought that I was understanding them.


Anyway....one page (front and back) later, I left his office with stuff that I needed to work on.  The only good thing is, is that no one in the office hates me.  At least not the ones I talked to.  They understand that I am a student and that I am learning and that I have other things (work and other classes) to deal with too and that I am not perfect. 


I even offered to try to rewrite it later in the quarter (after I read up alot more on the budget issues!!) and try to get it right!  I just spent the last hour or so going over his notes to me and all of the budget books and writing an email with corrections which I sent to my editor to look over before I send them to my source to look over.


And I serious feel like crap right now too.  I am not sure if its the stress from today or if it is a mix of stress and hardly eating or sleeping for the last week or so.  not sure...I'm hoping I feel better in the morning, but if not I am going to stay home from school and sleep!  At least if my ridiculous kitty will let!  She dosen't like it when I sleep late!

More accuracy issues

So for The Clipper we hand out accuracy surveys to the sources of our stories.  Well...today just sucked in that regards.

I did a profile for one of the clubs and interviewed three of the officers of the club (the president didn't attend the meeting I went to for my interview).  I went to their officer meeting today to get feedback (the president was there and seemed to have no idea that there was piece about them in the online edition of The Clipper).  So he was reading it for the first time and he turned to me and asked if it had been published already.  I said that it had, I was just getting feedback on my reporting and whether it was accurate.

He thought I portrayed the group as "chaotic" because I had said that they are currently homeless (they have no set meeting space and it changes every week).  The three other officers had said exactly that to me in the interviews, and so I thought it was a fun little fact and it was true and so I printed it.

He went to my editor after the officer meeting and basically told her to retract the story or parts of it.  And she said that since all of the information was true and accurate, there was nothing that she could actaully retract.  He was just pissed that I had made them sound like they didn't know whta they were doing.

So I have a feeling that he will go to the advisor for The Clipper and complain about me.  No one else from the club seemed to have a problem with it.  My editors agreed with me and thought that them being "homeless" was a cute little fun fact that made the story interesting.

I didn't think that it made them sound chaotic at all!!  It was funny and interesting and I am kind of annoyed that he has a problem with it.  Because he even told my editor that eveything (including the homeless bit) was true and accurate!!!

So annoyed...I will get to the other issue in another post!

Break-in at my neighbor's place and I saw the guy!!!! :-(

So Thursday night I got home from work between 9:15-9:30pm-ish.  I live down a dead-end alley and it is dark. As I was getting out of my car I realized that a dark colored car had followed me down to the end of the alley and it had turned around and parked between my carport and the carport of the next apartment over.  I saw a man in the passenger side and a woman driving.

As I was moving toward the walkway between the carports, he got out and started up behind me.  I had instantly gotten a bad feeling as soon as I noticed the car and so at this point was kind of freaking out.  As I was going around the side of my building I casually looked behind me and saw him still coming.  I live in one of the two bottom apartments and as I was walking around the stairs I again looked back and saw him start down the walkway towards me (away from the other building) and at this point...I am losing it!

I was hidden from him by the stairs and I ran to my door and was franitcally trying to unlock my door and when I got it, I threw it open and then slammed it shut and locked it!  My boyfriend was home cooking and he was weirded out about my behavior...so I told him about the guy.  And then I chilled out abit and didn't think anything else about it.  We turned up the tv (so we could hear it in the kitchen) and we went about cooking.

Then later that night (sometime between 2-4am) I was woken up by loud stomping around upstairs and doors opening and shutting.  Didn't think anything about it; our neighbor works late shifts at Boeing and is always getting home after midnight).

The next afternoon I got a txt from my landlord telling me that the apartment above ours had had the door kicked in the night before and had we heard or seen anything!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

OMG!  So I told her everything I could remember about the guy and she relayed it to our neighbor.  I stayed at my parents place on Friday between jobs because I was scared to be home by myself.  I had my boyfriend walk out and meet me when I got home that night too!  I borrowed a baseball bat from my dad and it is laying next to the bed right now.

I am freaking out a bit that this guy may realize that I saw enough of him to ID him!  Which I did tonight actually.  We went upstairs and talked to our neighbor and he showed me a picture of his cousin...and it was the guy I saw!  He had a feeling he knew who it was before that, but my ID of the guy made him even more sure. Scary!

So that was my scary excitement!  His tv, xbox and games, and a few other things are missing!  And I feel horrible because I had seen the guy that did it!  But neither me nor my boyfriend remember hearing anything after I came inside and slammed the door shut!  Our neighbor was cool about it though, he's not mad that we didn't hear anything but he did seem glad that I could ID the guy.  We'll see if I have to talk to the cops or not.

Wish we could have met the guy on better terms though.  He has lived there since almost last summer and because of our schedules, we have never really talked to him.  Which I feel kind of bad about that too....lol!  I am the kind of person that I like to know my neighbors.  We may bbq this summer though!  So that would be nice to get to hang out with him a bit.

lost post....

So I just wrote a post for the class...and it says that it is posted....but I can't seem to find it when I look at ly blog.  Can anyone tell me if they can access a post called Still on Fence w/Twitter!?!?!?

Still on Fence w/Twitter

WARNING!  I just read through this post before posting it...and it is very random..my thoughts didn't really mesh well!  lol!


I had a Twitter account several years ago.  I stopped using it because I was being followed by all these people that I had no idea who they were and it bothered me.  Not sure why, it just did.  It's like on Facebook, if I don't know you, I won't accept a friend request from you.  And I don't go through my high school yearbook and "friend" my whole graduating class (like several people I know).  It shouldn't matter how many friends or followers you have.

I had to get that out there!  I am a person that uses facebook to follow my family and friends news and ramblings.  I don't use it to meet people and talk to strangers.

I have never really understood the whole Twitter thing though.  Like I said, I tried it: didn't like it.  And now for my multimedia journalism class we are required to have an account.  So far I have followed news people.  CNN, Everett Herald, New York Times (NYT), David Carr (writer for NYT), Anderson Cooper...and alot more I can't remember right now.  I am also following my editors from the Clipper and a few of my multimedia classmates.

It's crazy how many tweets the NYT puts out there in an hour or two!  Good lord!  They take up half of my "tweets" from people!  And all they say are brief little phrases with a link to a story.  And half of them are stories that I honestly don't care about.  Which, being a journalist, I should.

Alot of the news stories that these people are tweeting about are breaking news or new updates on old stories.  So I understand why they are important to get out there, people need to hear about these things.  I think that is the only good thing about Twitter, si that it is updated alot more than an actual news website and such.

But then you have to think about all the random people and the celebrities that use Twitter and are just spewing stuff about how they just drank a coke...or they are going to a party to get wasted...or other such things and...who cares?  And all the people that tweet something and than it causes a national controversy.  I just am not sure if Twitter is right for me.  I like my Facebook.

I think part of why I am on the fence about Twitter is because, unlike most of the people that use Twitter, my phone is lame and doesn't do internet.  So I have to be on a computer in order to check out the latest on Twitter and so when I check it, everything is old news and there is lot of it.  And when I do go on Twitter, it's maybe once a day and I never really have any breaking news of my own to share.  And there is really never anything that I feel worthy enough to re-tweet either...I have had Twitter for a week or so...and I have made five tweets...three-four of which were re-tweeting something...

I don't knwo...we'll see how it goes...but right now I don't think that I will stay on Twitter after this class is over.

Stories and Work

Got two club spotlights turned in this week (one was a rewrite of a story that never actually got publushed last quarter.)  And also got a blog post about the Snapsot library event written and turned in yesterday.  In the process of writing one more club spotlight to turn in tomorrow morning/afternoon.  So far this last club has been the most laid back and active, so it will be pretty easy to write...so that's always nice.

I need to email/call a few people to set up some stories for next week and a blog post for the website that I need to get in tomorrow hopefully.  And I have several stories lined up for the coming weeks when events are happening, so thats good.  I can do some research and stuff before hand.  I also have a list of events I want to cover (mostly going to be blog posts or photo essays though) for Earth week at the end of the month.  Should be fun!

Outside of school, I just talked to one of my managers (at the job that I like better than my other one), and she said that there will be more hours for me there instead of just one day a week!  Which is awesome, given that I have about $200-$400 worth of repairs for my car.  And that's just for parts because my boyfriend is a mechanic and is doing the work for free.

Busy Day in the Life of a Student Journalist

Wow!  Today has been crazy!  This morning started out with a club meeting/interview that took an hour. (12:30-1:30pm)  I was then late for The Clipper class. (1:40-3:10pm)  This is the class of the school newspaper.  And then the class went late.  Which made me late for another club meeting/interview.(3:15-3:40)  And then I got halfway back across campus to the newsroom, when I remembered I was supposed to be checking out an event in the library. (3:45-4pm)  And been back in the newsroom since than.

I have two club spotlight stories to write and a blog piece.  And I need to email/call several people for interviews for other stories.  And tonight is production night for the paper, which means I am going to have to help edit stories and write headlines and such.  And all I want to do right now is go home and eat dinner with my boyfriend.  Such a long day!

Writer's block and a new car!

So I wrote one of my two stories on Friday and have been having major writer's block on my club spotlight story.  I am trying to get more of the member's voices in my stories and I wasn't able to get to the meeting for the club I am trying to write about.  So I have emailed my editor and the club's advisor and given them an update on my issues, witing to hear back, probaly tomorrow.  I am also going to start another spotlight story this week as well.  Trying to not overdo it this quarter with loading my work up so that I go crazy with exhaustion.


And I bought my friend's car from her today!  I drove it to the store and I drove it home by myself and then went for a drive with my boyfriend.  He has determined that there are several things I need to fix/replace.  Suspension, timing chain, oil change, possible radiator issues...plus a window that doesn't work, brakes that need to be flushed and dashboard lights that need to be fixed...


Just for the timing chain and the suspension (if it is in fact the ball bearing things with the suspension)...it is going to be close to $200 just for those two things!  Great way to welcome me to car ownership!!!!  Fun times!!!

Money rant...nothing to do with writing...sorry!

So this has nothing to do with my writing, but it is frustrating nonetheless!  I am buying a car from a friend and so have money set aside for that (I am buying it on Sunday).  But I still have an almost $100 code that I need to buy for my online math class (one of those hidden fees they get you with) and I still need to buy my two books for my multimedia class, for both it would be about $50.  And then on top of all of this...I have to come up with about $100 to transfer the title of the car and pay taxes on it!

And rent is due this week too...and then my phone and credit card bills are due in about a week and a half along with comcast.  Going to be a fun few weeks!!  If I wasn't buying the car from my friend...I would have the money for everything...and there in lies my dilemma!  Ugh!

That is all my ranting for the moment!  :-)  Gotta go catch the bus to work!  Adios!

Bored in the newsroom!

Can I just say one thing:  Being in the newsroom by myself is boring!  I'm usually in here with several of my fellow staffers...and usually nothing really productive gets done (at least for me)...but it's fun!  I guess one perk is I get to choose the music!  :-)

Did my interviews for my two stories I'm writing and now just sifting through my notes and research.  I do the Club Spotlight stories for The Clipper since last quarter and I am really trying to get more in depth with them.  I really want to participate or at least sit in on at least one of the meetings for each club, but working that around work and classes is tough.

The second story I'm working on is about the service and activities fees that students are charged as part of their tuition and what that money goes towards.  I won't get too in depth right now, you guys are just going to have to read the article when it comes out!

I am still trying to get used to interviewing people with titles!  lol!  I know it sounds stupid, but some of these people are a bit intimidating.  Not mean or anything, just higher up the food chain than me and so...intimidating.

Journalists are truth seekers

I have a good friend who is a fellow journalist and he is facing a dilemma right now with one of his stories.  He found out some information, (quite by accident) that could potentially have bad ramifications in the future (and possibly already has).  As a journalist it is our job to seek out the truth of an issue and report the facts.  The dilemma with this is that a person invloved in this situation is someone that my friend and I, (and the rest of our colleagues as well), hold very dear.  A great person, who is overworked but is always willing to take time out of his busy schedule to lend a helping hand.  My friend just kind of jumped in with the information he had without much digging and now this person that we all love could potantially get in trouble.

So the dilemma:  does my friend report the facts, and risk injuring his relationship (and the rest of us too actually) with this person even more?  Or does he report some of the facts and leave out key pieces of the story to try to save the friendship?

I told him that he needs to report the facts!  As much as it hurts to cause trouble for a friend...that cat is already out of the bag.  You can't just sugarcoat it because you're friends with someone.  We are truth seekers...we are the people entrusted to hold people in positions of power accountable for their actions and to let the public know of any wrong doings (whether intentional or unintentional, which in this case it wasn't done to intentionally cause harm to anyone).

He is still writing the piece and he said he would email it to me so I can give him some feed back.  So we'll see which way he goes with it.  I told him that he needs to be straight forward and tell the truth.  His digging into this issue has opened people's eyes and a problem is being fixed.  And that is the important thing to take away from this experience.  He told me yesterday that he as lost sleep over this whole thing and that he was considering leaving the field of journalism.  I told him that it wasn't always going to be like that and that he needs to stick with it.  He is a great writer and he has the instincts to be good at uncovering stories and it would be a shame if we lost his talent over this.

Bio of a Witchy Writer

My name is Merritt and I am starting this blog for a multimedia journalism class.  This summer I will be finishing my second year of college (I still have one more to go).  I am studying to be a journalist, but may end up just doing freelance work instead of working for an actual newspaper.  We'll see how it goes though.

So a little about me and my family life.  I turned 25 at the end of January (ironically the same day as mine and my boyfriend's six year anniversary!!)  :-)  I have lived in my current apartment for three years and I like it...I wish it were a three bedroom though!  lol!  My boyfriend and I rescued a little black and white kitty when she was three months old, and now she will be two in June!  She is my little "cow cat" and so her name is Bessie!  :-)  I was lame and never got my driver's liscense until three months ago and will be getting my first car this coming Sunday.  I am buying my friend's Ford Thunderbird from her!  yay!  It's green...which is my favorite color btw!

I am the second oldest of five kids; four girls and one lonely boy!  My older sister (who is 26) and her husband are celebrating their five year anniversary later this month.  My brother (who is 22) is in the army and was lucky enough to get stationed close to home!  He comes home most weekends and occasionally brings his buddies along!!  :-)  My youngest sister is 16 and a junior in high school.  She does it all!  Track, cross-country, band, Young Life, catering with our aunt and she is looking for a job too!  She is nuts!  My middle sister is 24 and works with me at one of my two jobs, she cashiers and I work the truck and stock the merch.  My other job I do sales, but may be transferring to a position off the sales floor soon.  In limbo with that right now.

My parents are going to be celebrating their 25th anniversay this summer!  My family is huge (on both sides!)  We live closer to my mom's side of the family.  My dad's side of the family mostly live across the country!  There are 4 sets of aunts and uncles on my mom's side, with (I think) 20 or so cousins (and at least 10 great-grandkids).  My dad's side...no idea!  I lost count!  He was one of five boys and a sister...so six total!  And most of them were alot older, and so alot of my cousins on that side are at least 10 years older than me!

My great-grandpa (on my dad's side) came to America from Poland in the late 30's to escape the Holocaust.  I am third generation polish and I take pride in that part of my heritage!  On my mom's side, my grandpa has traced his family back to the Mayflower...Mary Chilton was the first woman to step foot on Plymouth Rock!

I grew up in a Presbyterian church with my family, but have since decided to follow another path.  I have been Wiccan since I was about 12 years old.  I only just recently "came out" to my immediate family in tha last few years and they seem to accept it and they still love me!  The rest of my family...some may know, some may not.  I'm open about it but I don't really talk about it much.

Anyway, enough about me for now.  I will be back later!  Gotta go read up on some budget stuff for a story for the college paper!  :-)